Facebook has been a big distraction for my work, either when I am writing articles or after teaching classes/clients. I found it annoying to get constant reminders of other people’s, including: where they were, how they felt, who they were with, what they were doing etc. At some point I got really disturbed and as I am easily affected by people, I’ve decided to log out Facebook.
Suddenly I felt so quiet and serene. It feels that I could breathe again, finally!
There were at times pictures of couples, weddings, babies and so on, which does not make me feel so comfortable. They were people I knew but not people that were my friends. Those pictures give me some sort of panic and anxiety. I couldn’t help comparing myself, I’m still single, I am not ready for marriage nor to have a baby, but those pictures just kept reminding me that I am different.
Actually I really like the situation I am in, I’m full throttle for work, sports training and an amazing life. It doesn’t mean I don’t want to be with someone, get married or have babies.
It just felt that the timing hasn’t come; however, all the newsfeed from Facebook were quite outrageous and explicit, like people posting their delivery pictures, baby vomiting, intimate couple pictures etc. Also, people complaining about lives, critiquing people, cursing others etc. There were things I didn’t want to see but I was forced to see. There were no “filter” on Facebook and that’s why all those information flooded in and took up my emotional space and time.
Facebook allows us to create an online persona. It provides us a place to decide how we want the world to see us. We can select pictures or post articles that we feel represent us, but it might or might not be the reality. You never know until you meet the person. And even if you meet the person they might just be different online/offline.
One thing I noticed would help is to stop following some people, especially those that you find annoying with their posts. Secondly, I would only click in the timeline of someone I am interested in to check how they were doing. Otherwise, I am overspending time on tons of people that are actually not around me. I’ve also tried to lower the amount of time checking/stalking others on Facebook. It’s not necessary, its brings anxiety and it creates more comparison between me and the person. We were simply wasting time on someone/something that might not relate directly with us. Oftentimes, I found the real person and the person online can be quite different.
Thirdly, logging out Facebook really gives me a lot of time and focus. I no longer have to get disturbing reminders, pictures or messages (even advertisements!). It made me stay focused on my work and what I was supposed to do.
Researches show that when one increases the use of Facebook, their well-being decreases; while those they spend time with people face-to-face, the well-being increases. The real life interaction gives more direct feedback and human elements, such as emotions, love and communication. We would probably feel more warmth, comfort and loved with others and making real friends through true interactions.
To be honest, Facebook is fantastic! It helps me stay connected with people I have met throughout life, it helps me with my career and stay updated about the world. Nevertheless, some time-out and moderate using of Facebook would be important to stay on track with a healthy life.